The Next Big Thing

Many thanks to my generous friend and poetry compatriot, Sarah Fox, who tagged me for this!  (I love you Sarah for your belief in my writing.)

Doing this was challenging and fun and a bit like diving off the high board in an Olympic Pool when you're not even sure you can swim or are wearing a bathing suit that will stay on!  Yikes! :-)

What is the working title of the book?

Well actually I’m working on 2 books at once.   

Can I mention them both? (Sure you can.  I mean, why not?  I mean whose interview is this?  Who’s setting the rules?  Me, myself and I.  (Aha! 3 books!  Nah, 2 will do.)

So the first book’s working title is “Specter.”
The second book’s working title is “The (Good) Wife or Why We Leave.”

Where did the idea come from for the book?

Specter is a book of poems all of which are related to ghosts/specters/wraiths: my dead.  The idea came from the fact that dead people show up in my poems (and my dreams) a lot – apparently they are a preoccupation of mine -- and I finally figured they deserved their own book. 

It’s also because I don’t show up as much as I wish I did and so I tend to think that maybe I’m some kind of a specter or wraith that most people just don’t see.  So I deserve a book of my own also. 

Finally, “Specter” is also only one letter off from my actual birth name (Spector) so it feels fitting.

The (Good) Wife (or Why We Leave) is about a daughter/wife/woman who exists mostly in the shadow of her father/husband/self.  Yeah, the one who doesn’t show up.  The idea for the book was taken from my own life. 

For years I’ve felt kind of invisible.  For instance, at my brother’s wedding he and his wife hired a professional photographer who took hundreds of photos over the course of the afternoon.  I did not appear in one of them.  Which is pretty weird when you consider that my (now ex) husband was in several photographs, not to mention his sister and her husband who were also invited to the wedding. (It was a pretty big wedding.)  Where was I?  I’ve always wondered about that.  Can you spell invisible?

Then back in 1990 when I spent most of the year walking around on crutches after a bad ski accident I finally had to put fluorescent bike tape on the crutches in order to make myself more visible.  I’d be walking down the sidewalk and people wouldn’t see me and would bump into me.  Okay, it was New York City and okay, I’m short (5’2” at the time).  But still.

More to the point the book kind of addresses the question I got asked a lot (or I imagined I got asked a lot) by all those people who couldn’t figure out exactly what I was doing 15 years ago when I left a life and marriage that looked really good, really perfect, even great, on the outside but was stifling the inner me. So I moved away from an apartment in NYC (and a weekend house upstate and a retirement house in Jackson Hole) to a small cabin that was both in the woods and off the grid in Northern California. Yeah, I know hard to comprehend.  But there was a reason. 

And I figure I’m not the only woman who’s ever faced that in her life.  Great looking outside.  Not so great inside.  Those last several years of my not-so-great inner life I looked and looked for a book/novel that I could relate to.  That would help me figure out what to do.  I’ve got pretty decent researching skills but I couldn’t find anything.  

So I’ve decided to write the book I was looking for.

What genre does your book fall under?

Specter is poetry.

“The (Good) Wife”  is what I’m calling a “novoir” or a nomoir”  which is a hybrid somewhere between a novel and a memoir. No-moir.  Nov-oir. 

I like the “no-voir” because voir is to see in French and it’s a novel where my eyes finally open (from a lifetime of not seeing) and once I can see what’s going on and (re)act to it I’m finally able to move on from where I’m stuck.  On the other hand “no-moir” has a nice sound (as in No More) and that’s exactly where I finally found myself once my eyes were open (from no seeing) etc.  You get the idea, yes?

What actors would you choose to play the part of your characters in a movie rendition?

 A casting call for ghosts?  hmmmm. 

Seriously, there are some “characters” that appear in both books.

First are the geographics:  rocks both artificial (cement cityscapes) and natural (cliffs, mountains).

I think New York City could be played by Chicago or perhaps Toronto. 
 
The Shawangunks, where I spent many years rock climbing, should really be played by themselves. It would be hard to fake their famed horizontal crack systems.  The Wind Rivers and the Tetons – you could make do with some of the mountains in the Sierras, but why would you want to?

And then there’s Death Valley. A pivotal starring role in terms of life changing events.  But, if we wait long enough to film, there will be lots of places that will be desert-like to chose from. 

Then there are the humans:

THE MOTHER:  I’ve always thought that my mother could be played by someone like Rita Hayworth, a glamorous pin-up type from the 40s.  I mean she was a pin-up type herself.  I’ve even got the picture she send out to lonesome GIs who were overseas serving their country. 

                                                                 That's My Mom

                                                                    That's Rita Hayworth

You do see the resemblance, don't you?

THE FATHER:  My dad was a sleek, handsome man when I was growing up. And he was a pianist who played in nightclubs through much of my childhood. He did turn outdoorsy but that was after my parents divorced.  The bandleader, Peter Duchin, could play him.  There was actually a time when I was in my teens and Duchin was inventing himself as the reincarnation of his father (more ghosts) and my father  mentored him in the skills of a cocktail pianist.  (See pages 223-224 - Chapter 14 "Society Beat" - of "Ghost of a Chance" by Peter Duchin  for verification.)

THE BROTHER:  My brother was once told by someone in an elevator (I think) that he looked like Richard Gere.  Of course that was some years ago.  But maybe Gere would enjoy playing this supporting role.  After all we’re both Buddhists.  Or maybe I once dreamed a movie of my story and Gere was in the dream playing my brother.  So it’s fitting some how.

MY (EX) HUSBAND:  My aunt once told me that my (ex)husband looked a bit like Spencer Tracy, so maybe in the spirit of Specter, we could ask Mr. Tracy to resurrect himself for the purpose.  I can’t think of anyone from my story who’s enough like Kate Hepburn to encourage him (and her) to return but maybe, since the story is still a work in progress, I can add her in someplace.

THE AD YEARS: For the part of the story that takes place in the ‘60s at an ad agency we could ask the folks who do Mad Men to lend a hand.  Of course I’ve never watched a single episode because I’ve never felt I needed to watch the Hollywood version of what I lived but I’m sure there are several actors who will fit the roles of my DDB compatriots just fine.

THE CLIMBERS: For the climbing years – well, pretty much any of the stunt men whose names form the long, long list at the end of most action movies.

Did you think I forgot THE (GOOD) WIFE?  I didn’t.  Oh my we’ll have to find someone short.  Sally Fields?  Maybe she’s short (enough) but is she also athletic?  I mean can she climb rocks?  Ski? Work out at the gym?  Why am I even worrying about this?  They can do all kinds of things on film these days.  Or so I’m told.  I just checked on Google and she’s actually a year older than I am and 2” taller but as I said they can do all kinds of thing on film these days.

Or maybe, since this is my fantasy, I could find someone who’s tall(er) like Angelina Jolie.  Maybe Brad Pitt could play THE POET (my second husband).  With the two of them on board I bet the movie version would be a hit!  (Is that what I’m dreaming of?  A blockbuster and all that comes with it?  NO!  If we are going to think along those lines, I’ll settle for a book with a decent advance that stays in print.)


 What is the one sentence synopsis of your book?

1) Specter:  about MIDP (my Most Important Dead People known and unknown)

2) The (Good) Wife:  a woman who’s living what looks like a damn good life (by most standards) has a really bad skiing accident, is in recovery for almost a year, begins a meditation practice as part of her healing, sees a whole bunch of stuff about her life she’s been ignoring and decides to cut herself loose, leaving what she always thought she wanted behind and starting over.

How long did it take you to write the first draft of the manuscript?

Specter:  I started officially working on these poems (or talking about them as an idea for a book) in June 2011 but then I discovered I’d been working on it a lot longer when I went back and looked at poems I’d already written.

The (Good) Wife: I’ve been working on this ms for several years,  Or at least since 1995.  Or 1998.  Or maybe even 1966. Several years ago, I distilled the part about leaving NYC and arriving in California into a small self-published, hand-bound limited edition of 100 (there are still some copies left - if you’re interested let me know) called “everything breathing.”

"every breathing"

first page

 Who or what inspired you to write this book?

Specter was inspired by my mother who passed in 1993, by my good friend Joel who passed in 2012, by my dog who passed in 1985 and by some of the paintings done by Gerhard Richter.

The (Good) Wife is inspired by all the women out there who feel trapped by a life that leaves them empty but where they are too comfortable to make a change.  Also most recently by something that my ex-sister-in-law wrote to me: “It reminded me of everything you’ve been through to get to where you are now.  It’s almost like a fairy tale, at least the part where you started to travel to California for zen retreats and how you eventually moved away.  I think it would make an amazing tale.  But actually you have to tell the story from the beginning to realize how magical it is.”

Wow.  I mean how can you ignore that?

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?

It's a ghost story? It’s an adventure story?  It’s a love story?  It’s a story about escaping from what you’ve been told you should do to what you feel inside yourself you must do?  It’s a story about hibernating for years and years and finally walking out into the sunshine?

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?

a)Yes

b)No

c)Maybe

d) All of the above

My tagged writers for next Wednesday (2/20) are:

Marilyn Mociun, Nancy Jean Burns, Molly Fisk, Julie Valin, Susan Suntree and Dale Pendell

How many months?

Okay. I've been invited by my dear poetry mentor/friend/sister Sarah Fox to participate in something called The Next Big Thing.  (Thank you Sarah!) and since I haven't written anything here in so long this is perhaps a trial blog post just to make sure I remember how this whole thing gets from your fingers into cyberspace.

Actually there's lots going on in my poetic life.  I've got several poems out there in the world (or soon to arrive) -- some on these internet poetry websites others expected to appear in that old fashioned, and still very dear to me, form  -- the literary journals.  You know something you can hold in your hand, thumb the pages, curl up with and read and then put onto your bookshelf (if you have any room left on your bookshelf -- I don't at the moment) or in the alternative stack by the side of your bed or your desk or any handy surface (I've got lots of those).

For anyone reading this who is in the Port Townsend area, I'll be reading along with my husband Dale on April 25th at the Northwind Center.

And then here locally on May 19th at the Unitarian Universalist Church as part of a much larger benefit reading.  I participated in that same reading last year and it was one of the best run multi-poet readings I've ever been part of.  SRO also! (Who would think so many people would like to hear poetry on a Sunday afternoon.)

And if you are wondering why I don't post more often I think I'm just shy or not into telling people I barely know about the everyday workings of my life.  I am an avid journal keeper and most of that goes there.  I just started my 85th Journal a few days ago.  I began serious daily (almost) journaling back in September 1992.  I began making my own journals in 1996 (see # 16 below) and have finally settled on a size I really like (see #s 53 and on).

Okay, so I've figured out how to write something and even include pictures!

Stay turned (or tuned) for my self-interview The Next Big Thing to appear right here in the next day or two!